Meditation diaries

As days have moved past me, I am spending increasingly more time understanding the nuances of Kundalini Gnanam. I have broken away from addressing my practises as mere Yoga or Kundalini Yoga. It is definitely because it is not so. While Yoga lends itself to a lot of interpretations, Kundalini lends it a lot of character and the word Gnanam is in a similar vein.

The difference lies in Kundalini being a more particular description of the science and the word Gnanam being even more descriptive. Let me first start off with the word Kundalini. While Yoga is considered to be strongly related to ‘Asanas’, the word Kundalini gives it a more subtle sense. Kundalini talks about the subtle energy which keeps the whole world, me inclusive, going. The word Gnanam is descriptive of the highest sense of understanding, the pinnacle of Yogic achievement, as explained by my Guru.

Have started exploring various books in English and Tamil to collect my thoughts, experiment and understand the science. More to relate to what has been already been written. The fact that I have studied anatomy during my graduation has helped to a great degree. What is challenging in this initiative is the fact that so much has been written on this subject by so many Masters. All I can do is add my 2 pence to it.

Let me see.


Meditation diaries

I have noticed many a time that I would like to express myself, but it turns out that the subject has already been broached by a different author in a different medium. This is particularly true for reflections in the spiritual space.

Just to give an example, I have heard of a Tamil song, one portion of which goes on like this

‘ Thathuva kuappaiyai marandhuda cheyvai nee..’

To explain word by word,

‘Thathuvam’ means meaning or moral attached to a story or preaching

‘Kuppai’ meand garbage

‘Marandhidu’ means to forget

‘Cheyvai’ means to make something happen

‘Nee’ means you

This song is part of a devotional hymn sung during prayer in Tamil households, particularly devotees of Lord Murugan.

I have found this thought flashing through my mind many a time. This particularly comes to the fore when life in general is being dissected on the logical plane.

I can come up with a few arguments in support of my opinion that life cannot be dissected on the logical plane. But I would be contradicting myself.

Then the question is about how to go about this subject. The fact remains that some questions are never going to be answered by dissections on the logical plane and to move ahead in this search of this ethereal knowledge, faith helps a lot.

I do not why, but I have faith.

Faith that there are some unanswered questions in life and that I need not search externally, but I can get all the answers from within. One simple reason for this faith was the fact that I could see within myself, every grain of emotion that I had seen or heard of. I could just go through all these emotions at my whim and fancy.

I could feel like a sinner and saint. I could feel them all. When I went through this, I knew that the mind is the panoply of a lot of things that I need to explore and learn.

This same faith brought me in touch with my Guru. I never have a logical explanation of why I have spent about 5 years in meditative practices and a bit of yoga thrown in. From an outsiders point of view there are a few things which seem interesting like my ability to exert immense control over my habits, but they seem irrelevant to me. I can observe that my decision making abilities have improved immensely, but they again seem irrelevant to me. This puts me in a situation very similar to that of some of my colleagues. This does not help me answer the simple question, why am I they way I am?

Now I would like to agree with the Tamil adage that I started this write-up with. And I want to write about it. But some intellectual had realized it eons back and had written a poem about it. Here I am trying to expand the essence only to realize that there is nothing new in it.

Come to think of it, have ( Humanity) we really changed the way we think we have? It is a very interesting question. Think about it.

Everything is in the seed-3

After my last post on this topic, I have been left fumbling trying to find some physical explanation for abstract concepts. I am going to make a sincere effort at rationalizing spiritual concepts. 

Let us take the structure of the nervous system. We have a sructure called vertebral column which supports the skull and the vertebral column contains the nerve bundles which are conneced to the brain, which in turn, is encased within the cranium (skull). Now we have a structure called the cauda equina at the base of the vertebral column. If we look at these three structures together then the cauda equina, spinal column and the brain appear to be like a tree with the cauda equina happening to be the roots, the vertebral column happening to be the trunk and the brain appearing to be the ever spreading branches and leaves. Isn’t this a wonderful metaphor to look a the nervous super-structures in our body? It might not be exactly the same, but anybody with a bit of imagination will definitely agree that the similarity is very striking.

The similarity is even more striking for the fact that it helps us in the next part of the conversation which is trying to understand the root of our thoughts. If we continue our analogy of the ‘tree’, it is common knowledge that the tree receives nutrients from the roots and these nutrients are transported via the trunk to the leaves.The leaves use these nutrients and convert them into active ingredients (sugars) which help the tree sustain it’s energy needs and also grow in a continous fashion. So the origin is from the roots and the leaves are processing centres which aid growth. Both the root and the leaves complement each other. To put it in simple words, the energy comes from the roots while the leaves help to harness that energy.

Now applying this analogy to nervous super structure, the nutrients are in the region of the human genito-urinary system and these nutrients, in the form of thought energy are transported by the spine and harnessed by the brain. This harnessing of energy is what leads us to thought processes and it’s manifestations in our day to day life.

Without going into abstract discussions which cannot be proved in the physical plane, I can propound a vague hypothesis that there is some co-relation between the human genito-urinary system and the origin of our thoughts. Isn’t it interesting that the next generation takes root from our genito-urinary system and our thoughts also seem to take root from the same genito-urinary system. Now wouldn’t you accept that if ‘A’ is connected to ‘B’ and ‘B’ is connected to ‘C’, then then there is a high possibility of connection between ‘A’ and ‘C’?

Then in the same vein, I sugges that there is a high probability of a connection between our thoughts and our next generation. Now the relation between the human seed and human thought is something which has been elucindated at a macro-level. Now my understanding of Yoga is to control the human energy space. Given this the relationship between yoga and the next generation is sligthly clear.

Writing this has brought me immense pleasure. I hope you feel the same too.

Everything is in the seed-2

Talking about the human seed, I am reminded of the Tamil word for father-‘Thanthai’. This word is actually broken down to ‘Thannai thanthavar’, which basically means one who has given himself. There could be myriad interpretations for this and my understanding is it basically means a person who has given himself, which means everything which he represents-in terms of shape, size, features on the physical plane and thoughts, feelings and emotions on the mental plane. All this for the process of procreation with an element of chance attached to it. The element of chance is by the process of dividing the human DNA during sperm generation, with various permutations and combinations. 


It is interesting that the word should exist thousands of years ago when there was no microbiology and research on DNA to be able to prove the fact that DNA is the blueprint of the body in every sense and the DNA is suitably cleaved during sperm generation, to be able to unite with the egg and form the seed for a human being in the ‘soil’ of the womb.

By this, I am in no way alluding to any opinion about the Tamil language. My focus would be on the fact that the seed for the next generation is derived from the present generation.

My next train of thought would be a commentary that I had read about ‘Surya Namaskar’ in numerous books. It goes like this..

“As per the scriptures one who performs the Surya Namaskaras daily does not get poor in a thousand births.”

Without going into metaphysical discussions of rebirth, I am sure it would be acceptable to say that the father and mother do give themselves for the formation of a seed, which gives rise to the foetus and then the child. If this is clear then the discussion now moves to the spehere of yoga to get an understanding of the effects of yoga.

Now again, this leads me to very interesting thoughts which I will share in my next post.